PROJECT SECRET FRIENDSHIP RENEWAL Package

Though I made the holiday peace offering dinosaur a few weeks back, I haven't had a chance to create the full "package" and plan how I'd deliver the package to the person in question for the following reasons:


1. I have been really busy with work and school
2. I didn't want to send it via post because the handmade items (such as googly eyes) might fall off if they're handled a lot
3. She does not have an easily accessible mailbox
4. I'm pretty sure she is still very bitter about everything (I still don't fully understand some of the reasons for why she is upset...) and my lack of understanding is fueling my insecurity about sending her a peace offering.


I decided to opt NOT to write a message like "I made this holiday dinosaur for you. Can we be friends?" with an attached check "yes" or "no" box because I think it's a bit too direct.  Normally, I am very direct, but knowing that she is the type of person to hold grudges and be very upset about things for long periods of time, I thought it best to sort of say things indirectly.

For those of you who might have trouble with small text, I'll transcribe the message.  It says:


"Dear ________,


This is Steggy, the holiday dinosaur.  He is really happy that it is Christmas and he looks very festive in his red feathers.  He wants to thank you for drawing him and bringing him to life.  He also wants to wish you a very merry Christmas.  I hope he will prove to be a very loyal and fun friend for you!"


I'm hoping she'll find it humorous and less "serious," though I am very serious and eager about moving on and letting bygones be bygones!


Anyway, I just spent a couple hours fashioning a letter and envelope.  I must say that I am proud of my work and I hope she takes this as evidence that I do think about her often and that I do very much want to let the past be the past.  I am not angry anymore and I hope that she has let go of her anger as well... so here it is!  Keep your fingers crossed that she'll at least email or text me that she got it!!!

Images made and modified using Portrait Illustration Maker and MS Paint

Insecure Moment or Moment of Clairvoyance?

PROJECT SECRET FRIENDSHIP RENEWAL: Unveiled!

I fell out with one of my oldest and closest friends a little more than a year ago, and to be quite honest, the experience crushed me. 

We always got along amazingly well until the friendship took a toll for the worst, quite unexpectedly.  It seemed conclusive that our long-lasting and otherwise easy-going friendship was officially at its end.  It was a hurtful experience for us both, and even with a mediator trying to get us to overlook our differences, we just couldn’t see eye to eye.

Recently, our mutual best friend (also our mediator) got married, and we got in contact again.  Judging from our conversations, I think that it might be possible to … MIGHT… to rekindle the friendship.  I am just really, really scared of hurting her again or getting hurt and of her rejecting my genuine attempt to befriend her. 

So because our words failed us the past, and because we are mutually not very appreciative of cheesiness (ok, I do but only when it comes to my boyfriend), I think I’ll take a gentle, non-threatening approach to attempt to befriend her.

I call this gentle, non-threatening approach

PROJECT SECRET FRIENDSHIP RENEWAL.

OK. It is not secret anymore.  But it will be secret to her! 

This project will have several stages, and I will require much courage to follow through with it, seeing that I am really scared of feeling rejected by her and feeling that she doesn’t care.

The first stage will be to send her a holiday craft in the mail.  It will be fashioned in the likelihood of an illustration she drew with me at our friend’s bridal shower.  Yes, she also draws dinosaurs.  At grown-up events.  Hers was a stegosaurus with feathers for plates.  I hope she will like it and not throw it in the trash :(

Should I write something like this attached to the dino craft I made?

I guess we’ll see where all this goes.  I think the pain is still there for us both, but I am ready to at least try again.  I don’t know what or when or even if there will be a phase 2 of PROJECT SECRET FRIENDSHIP RENEWAL (what if I get hurt againnnn), but I know I have to be strong and just TRY.  I honestly want to do things right and I want her to know that I am willing to let the past go.

Um. Yeah.  That was kind of… personal.  Guess all I can do is stay positive and keep trying!!!

Or should I just write this?  I don't know!!!

Top secret mission which will make sense to no one but myself

 

Hint: There will be one googly eye. There will be feathers. There will be sparky foam sheet. There will be Christmas. And there will be a surprise! 

But...there may also be failure. The end.

This is the national "identity" parade

I found some old class notes of mine, circa 2000-2001.  I think these were from some humanities course, drawn during my racially-conscious-and-mad-about-it!!!! days.

 "This is the national identity parade" is from an Asian Dub Foundation song called "The Real Great Britain." It basically criticizes multicultural societies for creating and perpetuating ethno-cultural stereotypes.

Dear Bummykins,